An Angry Awakening

Looking past the deceit regarding spirituality

There comes a time when no matter the training that you have persevered. Not matter the strength and power you have accumulated you encounter something in which you are pitifully prepared for and your best isn't, wasn't enough.

It is very easy for one that is outside that situation to tell the fallen to pick themselves back up. Get up, get back into the fight. So easy it is to place yourself in that lowered position and claim while you are in good health, good standing, that you could do it.

So often I look back into my Christian roots and remember the saying that was spouted to me day in and day out by those sheeple higher up on the ladder than I. That God would never give you trials in which he knew you couldn't handle. In my conditioned youth I took hope from that. I took strength in that there would always be someone looking down upon me and blessing me with strength when I had no more of my own to spare. Such warmth I felt when I gave in and conformed, believed that there would always be that safety net.

When I awakened later in life. I awakened in anger. I saw with eyes no longer burdened with the false promises that a lesser conditioned people imposed on me and everyone around them. I saw holes in their theories that swore I would be protected. Holes in the mentalities that all one had to do was bow down before life conform and all would be well. I saw noble and good people never attaining anything greater than what they had because they were too limited in their actions to move in a different direction.

I saw the predators taking advantage of these same people and gaining, prospering, and advancing simply because they were not bound to the same rules that these other folk were. The more I awakened and saw more clearly the more angry and furious I got. These rages stirred within me to look beyond the dreams of conformity, but to myself I would look to and find my path through.

Look what the light suggests, that anger, hate, and all the other black emotions as they call them aren't saviors but those that damn one to a place of complete darkness.  I take that gladly, I shall not suffer the glory in which those that seek conformity end up serving.  Power is an absolute, to have power is to conquer fear, it is to conquer limitations.  Through power my own godhood shall come.  Through my means, through my wants, and through my choices.  Let those that stand in my way know the fury of a patient calculating opponent.